photo credit: Denise ~*~
First, we shared with you the importance of listening to your partner. It was a major factor in your becoming a couple. Because you were able to talk and be heard, you felt cared for and supported. And somewhere along the process, you became friends and lovers. At least, we hope so.
A good friend is a person you can talk to. You can share your most intimate thoughts, secrets, worries and feelings without fear of shame or ridicule. You are confident that your friend will always be there for you 24-7 no matter what by offering unconditional love and support. And because you have a friend you can count on, you are better able to handle life’s challenges.
It’s really unfortunate and quite sad that far too often, couples start off being friends but lose their friendship along the way. And when you lose your friendship, you lose a very important aspect of your relationship. Too often, friendship takes a back seat to work, bill paying, child rearing, cooking, cleaning, grass cutting, and a lot of “things to do” to manage a household. However, a relationship is not much fun when all you do is to get bogged down with a lot of “tasks.” Is it any wonder, then, that your relationship may not be nearly as exciting as it once was?
We’d like to suggest that it is possible to “do life” and be friends. In fact, we’d even suggest that life works far better when your friendship is the underlying basis for everything you do in life.
If you’d like to restore the kind of loving connection you once had, we’d suggest that you schedule the time on a daily basis to talk like you once did. And, really listen to each other without judgment or advice–unless requested. Talk about your life challenges and your successes–about your worries, fears, hopes, and desires. Share your most intimate thoughts and feelings about where you are right now. And listen to each other not only with your head but also with your heart.
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Here’s to your relationship success!
Jesse and Melva
